Prayer while Longing for Children

Lord, Lord, what wilt Thou give me, seeing I go childless? O my God, I see how Thou hast bestowed the blessing of wedlock upon others in abundant measure, but from me Thou hast thus far withheld it. Lord, Lord, grant that I may resign myself to Thy will, and bear my trial patiently. I know that Thou art an almighty God, and that, if Thou wilt, Thou canst easily make me fruitful and give me children. I know also that Thou art a gracious God, who lovest me and who hast never denied me Thy favor. Therefore I will patiently submit to Thy will in this matter also. Thou knowest best why Thou hast not bestowed this blessing upon me. If it be that I am too weak to bear children, or too indolent to train them properly, or disposed to be too despondent under the cares which children bring with them, — then I recognize Thy goodness in withholding them and sparing me, lest I be tried above that I am able.

But if Thou wilt not give me the joy of having children, grant that I may all the more rejoice in Thee, love Thee fervently, and find all my joy and delight in Thee. Let me remain steadfast in my faith in Thee, O Triune God, in love toward my neighbor, and in holiness of life. Let me walk in all godliness and honesty in the sight of my fellowmen. Let Thy Holy Spirit convince my heart more and more that this is Thy holy will concerning me, and enable me cheerfully to resign myself to Thy will. Preserve my heart from envy, irritableness, impatience, and ill-will toward the partner of my married life, so that I may nevertheless love him from my heart, regard him in place of a child, and love him more than ten sons or daughters.

If, after I have waited a while longer, it be Thy will to make me a mother and to remember me as Thou didst Hannah, then convince my heart of this Thy gracious intention. But if Thou wilt not give me an heir at all, O Lord, then shall it be my only concern to walk in Thy statutes: Jesus shall be the consolation of my heart and my portion. Lord, Lord, all things are possible with Thee. It is but a small matter for Thee, who didst let Sarah conceive when she was long past the time of nature, to bless my hitherto childless state. Lord, bestow a child upon me, then will I thank Thee for the gift all my life, and bring it up to Thy praise and glory. Let me not be envious when I see other homes which Thou hast filled with children, but let me show all the more love and mercy to poor and forsaken little ones, and clothe them, care for them, provide for them.

And now let Thy mercy, O Lord, be upon us, according as we hope in Thee. Gladden me, comfort me, help me. Grant me children, if it be Thy will, — but not in anger, nor as a punishment upon me, nor to my shame. If it be salutary for me, grant my prayer according to Thy mercy. But if it be not Thy will, I would not seek to compel Thee to give me a child; for I do not desire to receive anything, neither children nor anything else, contrary to Thy will. Lord, I have poured out my heart before Thee. I beseech Thee, do as Thou wilt, and as is best for me! Grant that I may possess my soul in patience, till Thou sendest the help I crave. Amen.